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10 Myths about BDSM

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It’s easy to get a lot of things wrong about BDSM if you learn about it from pop culture, fashion magazines, and most of the top sites on the Internet. When Mimsy was new to BDSM, her education at Google University led her to wonder if there was a place for her in the community as a bedroom-only D/s enthusiast because it seemed like the scene was meant only for 24/7 lifestylers. When Vagabond was starting out, he thought BDSM was all about S/M, impact, and role playing and didn’t discover D/s until later. Over time, we separated the myths and misconceptions from the reality, and now we hope others can learn from our mistakes.

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Killing Kinking Eve: Season 2

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Photo Credit: Parisa Taghizadeh/BBCAmerica.

Warning: This post contains some spoilers.

The switchy dance of dominance/submission and voyeurism/exhibitionism that’s established in season 1 of Killing Eve is amplified in season 2. Villanelle is alive, and rather than being furious at Eve for nearly killing her, she seems to view the stabbing as something that irreparably binds them together—the ultimate act of intimacy. But Villanelle isn’t the only female assassin in town now. Another woman, dubbed the Ghost, is also killing high-profile targets and has eclipsed Villanelle while she’s been recovering from her wound. 

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Killing Kinking Eve: Season 1

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Warning: This post contains some spoilers.

If you haven’t seen Killing Eve, chances are you’ve heard about it—the show about Eve, a buttoned-up British intelligence agent, and Villanelle, the charming sociopath assassin she’s after. Much has been written about the show’s excellent acting and writing, strong female characters, and the sexual orientations of Eve and Villanelle. But something that has been curiously and consistently overlooked is that this show is kinky as fuck. In fact, when viewed through a BDSM lens, the LGBT themes in the show quickly take a backseat to a pervasive switchy voyeurism/exhibitionism dynamic that’s fueled by danger.

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Calling All Kinky Wedding Ideas

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Dear Readers,

We interrupt our semi-regularly scheduled posting to bring you this special announcement: We got engaged! Vagabond popped the question in front of the speakeasy in Greenwich Village where we met for our first date three years ago, and Mimsy was overjoyed. On the walk home, the conversation turned kinky.

Vagabond: Asking for your hand was the last question I’m ever going to ask you.
Mimsy: Oh, really? Why’s that?
Vagabond: Because everything else, I’m just going to take.
Mimsy: [swoons]

Needless to say, we’re beyond thrilled to spend the rest of our kinky lives together and would love to figure out a way to give a nod to BDSM at our wedding without tipping off the vanilla folk. Handfasting, for example, is something we’ve considered, because it represents being bound together on two levels: symbolically and, for us, literally, because we practice rope bondage. It’s the kind of thing that will be a recognizable double entendre for our kinky friends, but will be seen as nothing more than a lovely ritual by guests who aren’t in the know.

Are there other things we could incorporate into the wedding or reception that would function on kinky and vanilla levels at the same time? We want to know!

If you’ve had your own kinky wedding, have attended someone else’s, or just have great ideas you’ve tucked away about how to subtly reference BDSM on your special day, we’re all ears. Leave a comment below or contact us directly!   

Bound Together

One couple’s insights into BDSM. About us.

 

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