Bound Together
One couple’s insights into BDSM

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BDSM Convention Tips: Top 10 Things to Know Before You Go

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Kinky sex toys on top of clothes in an open suitcase

The first time we attended a BDSM convention, we had no tips to follow and no idea what to expect. Would we fit in? Would we know what to do? What to wear? The short answer is yes! BDSM conventions warmly welcome everyone regardless of age or body type. Further, we were relieved to discover that BDSM “cons” share more similarities with other types of conventions than you might guess: educational sessions, vendors, social events, and crappy hotel food. Of course, most conventions don’t include dungeons.

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Playing Dress-Up: What to Wear to Kink Events

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Woman wearing lingerie under a cropped jacket

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“Fetish Costumes Only! No Casual Street Clothes! No Jeans!” If you’ve ever considered going to a kink event but hesitated because of seemingly strict dress codes like this one, you’re not alone. The good news is that it’s very unlikely you’ll need to buy a closet full of fetish wear to attend a BDSM party or even a BDSM convention. With a little creativity, you can whip up something perfectly suitable using what you already own.

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Rough Body Play: How to Punch Someone You Care About

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Two fists in a fist bump

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Kink Academy link below.

Spanking, flogging, and even whipping are all accepted forms of impact play for many kinksters, but rough body play—punching, slapping, kicking, and so on—can make even experienced players flinch (pun intended). Punching in particular seems to get a bad rap even though it can be an intensely visceral way of connecting to your partner if done the right way.

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10 Myths about BDSM

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A unicorn labeled "myth" next to a rhino labeled "reality"

It’s easy to get a lot of things wrong about BDSM if you learn about it from pop culture, fashion magazines, and most of the top sites on the Internet. When Mimsy was new to BDSM, her education at Google University led her to wonder if there was a place for her in the community as a bedroom-only D/s enthusiast because it seemed like the scene was meant only for 24/7 lifestylers. When Vagabond was starting out, he thought BDSM was all about S/M, impact, and role playing and didn’t discover D/s until later. Over time, we separated the BDSM myths and misconceptions from the reality, and now we hope others can learn from our mistakes.

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Killing Kinking Eve: Season 2

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Scene from season 2 of Killing Eve; woman in flouncy dress wearing a pig mask and holding a knife
Photo Credit: Parisa Taghizadeh/BBCAmerica.

Warning: This post contains some spoilers. Also, as an Amazon associate, we earn from qualifying purchases made through some of the links below (at no additional cost to you).

The switchy dance of dominance/submission and voyeurism/exhibitionism that’s established in season 1 of Killing Eve is amplified in season 2. Villanelle is alive, and rather than being furious at Eve for nearly killing her, she seems to view the stabbing as something that irreparably binds them together—the ultimate act of intimacy. But Villanelle isn’t the only female assassin in town now. Another woman, dubbed the Ghost, is also killing high-profile targets and has eclipsed Villanelle while she’s been recovering from her wound. 

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Killing Kinking Eve: Season 1

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Warning: This post contains some spoilers. Also, as an Amazon associate, we earn from qualifying purchases made through some of the links below (at no additional cost to you).

If you haven’t seen Killing Eve, chances are you’ve heard about it—the show about Eve, a buttoned-up British intelligence agent, and Villanelle, the charming sociopath assassin she’s after. Much has been written about the show’s excellent acting and writing, strong female characters, and the sexual orientations of Eve and Villanelle. But something that has been curiously and consistently overlooked is that this show is kinky as fuck. In fact, when viewed through a BDSM lens, the LGBT themes in the show quickly take a backseat to a pervasive switchy voyeurism/exhibitionism dynamic that’s fueled by danger.

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Calling All Kinky Wedding Ideas

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Man and woman holding hands, their wrists tied together with a ribbon

Dear Readers,

We interrupt our semi-regularly scheduled posting to bring you this special announcement: We got engaged! Vagabond popped the question in front of the speakeasy in Greenwich Village where we met for our first date three years ago, and Mimsy was overjoyed. On the walk home, the conversation turned kinky.

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Bound Together
One couple’s insights into BDSM