Aren’t consensual non-consent (CNC) scenes supposed to be carefully planned and negotiated? How can a CNC scene be done safely in the heat of the moment? The answer to the first question is yes! Especially if you have something elaborate in mind. But if you know your partner well, it’s entirely possible to add spontaneous CNC to your kinky repertoire without discussing every detail ahead of time.
(more…)Rough Body Play: Intro to Face Slapping
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The first time I was slapped in the face during sex was during a kinky hook-up. I was still new to BDSM at the time and wasn’t exactly sure what to expect. The surprise, the taboo of it, my submissiveness—I loved it all. Even though the guy hadn’t hit me that hard, I felt the sting for hours afterward, at least in my mind, and I knew immediately that I wanted to be with someone who would do that to me again. Fortunately, when I met Vagabond, he was more than happy to oblige.
(more…)How to Create the Best BDSM Scenes
Rough Body Play: How to Punch Someone You Care About
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Kink Academy link below.
Spanking, flogging, and even whipping are all accepted forms of impact play for many kinksters, but rough body play—punching, slapping, kicking, and so on—can make even experienced players flinch (pun intended). Punching in particular seems to get a bad rap even though it can be an intensely visceral way of connecting to your partner if done the right way.
(more…)How to Negotiate BDSM with a Partner
If you’ve spent more than a few minutes researching BDSM, you know that negotiation, or the process of deciding what will and will not happen in a scene, is one of the cornerstones. Much has been written about how to negotiate before a scene with a new play partner. Tools, from worksheets to checklists to illustrated guides, abound to help you cover all the bases and inspire you to dream up new fantasies. Here’s how to take those negotiation skills and weave them into the fabric of your relationship. (more…)